Following the sexy Ode to Neville Longbottom, which successfully rhymed the word "Neville" with "Breville", the Potter tribute songs continue with a song about Harry's brainiest sidekick. That's right, you guessed it:

 

 

Meet Hermione Granger. Or, as the entire world thought she was called for at least three years, "Her-mee-own".

With Deathly Hallows Part 2 on the horizon, that really needs to change. And so after a decade of being played by Emma Watson - who's gone from over-eager midget to full-on wizard hottie - Hermione's here to explain once and for all how to say her name.

Yes, this is Hermione Granger singing That's Not My Name.

 

 

 

(And before you say it, yes, you're right: there aren't many words that rhyme with Hermione.)

 

Back when Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince came out, the world was shocked by the realisation that Professor Percival Wulfric Brian Dumbledore had stolen Gandalf's beard. Right off his magical face.

 

Dumbledore confesses beard theft to Harry Potter.

 

 

Gandalf plots revenge from a distance.

 

Now, two years later, we've got some more new photos of Peter Jackson's The Hobbit, and they prove that Gandalf is striking back with a beardy vengeance. And not just against Dumbledore: he's stealing facial fuzz from everyone.

 

 

 

Has your beard been stolen by Sir Ian McKellen? Go to www.gandalfstolemybeard.com now. 

 

With only four weeks until Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows Part 2, the massively successful series is almost over. And it's kind of sad, in a way - something hammered home yesterday by the final trailer for the final part of the epic franchise finale. It's all sounding rather final really. (Sad face.)

And so I'm taking the time to bid farewell to some of the best characters from the Potter films - hopefully one per week for the next month (presuming I can be bothered). First up? Neville Longbottom.

 

We all know Neville Longbottom is a total dude. Even if you haven't read the books, you just need to look at Matthew Lewis to see his incredible transformation over the years. He's gone from the podgy doofus above to this:

 

His complete and utter bad-assery is why I felt the need to pay tribute to Neville Longbottom in a song.

And so without further ado, this is an Ode to Neville:

 

 

And yes, I am also annoyed that I spelt Remembrall wrong, but I was distracted by thoughts of Matthew Lewis covered in melted cheese at the time.

 

If you have other characters from the Harry Potter series that you'd like to be immortalized in (rubbish) song form, send your requests to @iFlicks - and I'll try to think of excuses for ignoring them.

 

"Harry Potter. The Boy who Lived... come to die."

It's almost impossible to get sick of hearing that same line over and over in each Harry Potter trailer since 2009. But just in case, this time it's accompanied by Voldemort yelling his face off. A lot.

Yes. the final Deathly Hallows Part 2 trailer is here and - just like the last Harry Potter trailer - it's immense. It has dragons, Alan Rickman, Gary Oldman's moustache, Voldemort shouting sexy things like "NYAAA!" and "OOOARGHHH!! and it looks spectacular.

This is the shortest Harry Potter film yet at 130 minutes. Judging by the amount CGI on show, 90 minutes of that could be a full-on wizarding battle. With fighting Hogwarts statues and everything. Oh, and for those who hate Quidditch, you get to see the stadium burn to the ground too. Yeah. Screw you, Quidditch.

Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows Part 2 is out on Friday 15th July. And if you're sad that this is the last trailer (*sob* it's almost the end), then don't worry: there's more Potter video goodness coming your way tomorrow...

Read on for the awesome trailer. 

Let's face it: after that Deathly Hallows Part 2 trailer, there's really not much that will make me more excited about the Harry Potter finale. David Yates is directing, Hogwarts gets blown up, and people die. Oh, and there are dragons.

But 26 new stills? That'll just about do it.

Ok, we've seen a few of these before (sneaky Warner Bros and their tricksy PR), but no-one's going to resent having to look at Voldemort's sex face for a second time. Plus there's this wonderful intimate photo of Tom Felton with Draco Malfoy's most loyal male companions: 

 

 

Awww, they're holding hands. 

 

Harry Potter 7.2 is, of course, released on Friday 15th July. Read on to see all the images, or head this way to see the Deathly Hallows Part 2 trailer. Again.

"Only I can live forever..."

We've all heard that before in every single Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows trailer there's ever been (and there were quite a few). But now there's finally a finished film to go with it, which makes Voldemort's line way more exciting. Although it's still a total bum-faced lie.

I won't bother with the full plot: it's pretty obvious by now that Harry Potter is a good wholesome little wizard while Ralph Fiennes is the kind of nutjob who would do something like split his soul into tiny pieces. And that they're both destined to kill each other or something.

Whatever, it involves magic. And if there's one thing director David Yates is good at, it's magic. (Why are you reading this? The video's down there somewhere.)

There's lots to enjoy in the new footage, from Mrs Weasley getting her fight on to a giant dragon busting out of Gringotts bank. Best of all? The distorted Hedwig's Theme at the beginning. (SERIOUSLY WHY ARE YOU STILL READING?)

Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows Part 2 (or HP 7B) is released on Friday 15th July, with the premiere on Thursday 7th July in both Trafalgar Square and Leicester Square.

Read on for the full video in HD. Then commence squeeing.

The new poster for Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows: Part 2 has turned up online on the official Facebook page - and you can tell Warner Bros mean business.

Building up for the final showdown between The Boy Who Lived and He Who Shall Not Be Named, it's The Fight What People Have Waited For. Which explains why the Potter studio have tried to echo the poster for the greatest battle in cinema's history.

 

 

In a bold move, there's not even a title on the blood-splattered poster, so it could well be the start of a campaign for Bride Wars 2: Electric Boogaloo. Oh yes, I'm excited.

Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows: Part 2 will bring about total world destruction on Friday 15th July - not at 7:15pm, as previously advertised.

 

As any listener of the Wittertainment podcast should be aware, yesterday saw the premiere and online release of Benjamin Sniddlegrass and the Cauldron of Penguins (trailer over here).

 

A film born out of an in-joke bred from a film review, it's a spoof of Percy Jackson and the Lightning Thief. But writer, director, producer, and Kermode and Mayo fan Jeremy Dylan has never seen Percy Jackson and the Lightning Thief. And it shows - mainly because Benjamin Sniddlegrass and the Cauldron of Penguins (or BSATCOP) is nothing like Christopher Columbus' family adventure. It's more fun. And it has more penguins.

Director: Jeremy Dylan
Cast: Andrew Griscti, Catherine Davies, Dorian Newstead, Alec Doomadgee, Stephen Fry
Release Date: Available now online

Love. Magic. Skiffle. From writer-director Jeremy Dylan, Benjamin Sniddlegrass is the story of a nerdy skiffle-loving redhead from Cockfosters, who discovers he's a wizard.

He journeys to Australia and is taught magic under the watchful eye of mentor Pentangle and filmmaker Werner Herzog, while a romance blooms with fringed smartarse Scarlett McKenna. Soon, he must battle the evil gorilla-faced Lord Emmerich.

But what is the secret of the cauldron of penguins?

The King's Speech opened across the UK with an incredible total of £3.5m.

Like you didn't see that coming. Cinemas were selling out. Momentum were tweeting their faces off with audience reactions. And my parents actually went to the cinema for the first time in blooming ages. All clear signs for a royal sweep at the box office.

127 Hours and Colin Firth went head-to-head in full Oscar-grabbing gear, but Firthy came out on top with an excellent debut total. Of course, 127 Hours was in second place with £2.16m, a figure as solid as a rock (HA HA).

Both included previews (James Franco was stuck under a boulder since Wednesday, while Firth stammered his way through last Sunday) but the momentum went away from the Slumdog director as Tom Hooper's biopic rode a wave of positive buzz.

Flashback to the same time slot in 2008, and awards favourite Slumdog Millionaire opened with £1.8m. It then went on to bulldoze through the UK Top Ten until April. So Danny Boyle's got nothing to worry about really, as long as The King's Speech doesn't hog all the screens (127 Hours is on at 311, while His Royal Highness is filling up 398). 

Little Fockers dropped the standard 32% for its third week near the top of the table. In fourth, Gulliver's Travels dropped a massive 78%, but after such a large New Year haul it still raked in £1.55m - enough to hold Russell Crowe's prison break back in fifth place, and enough to overtake Tron's floppy total. Paul Haggis' thriller notched up £1.05m including previews, which is alright given the competition but far off Robin Hood's debut of £5.7m. It'll be interesting to see how that compares with Conviction next week.

At the bottom of the charts, Narnia and Harry Potter outlasted The Way Back and Megamind. And The Tourist, thankfully, will never be heard of again.

All in all, it's a very strong week for British cinema, proving that UK audiences aren't afraid of awards contenders - as long as they feature massive rocks or the Royal Family. Sadly, they were less interested in Season of the Witch, which slid in at number ten on just £559k. Unsurprising, perhaps, but at least that's higher than its RottenTomatoes score.