If you go down in the woods today, you're bound to see a cabin COVERED IN DIRTY FILTHY SPOILERS. From The Hollywood Reporter to Village Voice, grumpy folks the world over are dishing the dirt on Drew Goddard's endlessly surprising horror flick in rubbish film-ruining reviews.

In response, geeks the world over are desperately trying to avoid spoilers of any shape or size. Some people have even evolved a hard, shell-like covering within which to cower, thus deflecting any spoilers that may have been bitten by a radioactive fly and become airborne.

But wait! Before you crawl under a rock/walk around blindfolded/gouge out your faceholes to block out all visual and acoustic stimuli, help is at hand with our patented The Cabin in the Woods De-Spoilerificator.

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And now that's sorted, you don't need to worry about reading that at the end of the film it turns out that everyone is actually a ▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓.

A big tip of the hat to Greg Leuch for his super-sexy ▓▓▓▓.