BlogalongaBond. One Bond film a month until Bond 23 turns up in November next year.

Mr. The Incredible Suit's evil scheme sounds like a great idea as long as you don't think about Roger Moore (ha, now you're thinking about Roger Moore).

But where to start? Well, how about with this exciting letter that I found lying in the skip behind Argos last night: 

 

Dear Dr. No,

I've always wanted to be a Bond villain, ever since I was voted most likely to be a megalomaniacal nutjob in primary school. But how do I start? I could always get round to hollowing out that volcano in the back yard, but my cat is very needy and takes up a lot of time. As a leading evil genius, any advice you can give to an ambitious criminal like me would be really nice. Perhaps you would like to be the first member of my new club, SPECTRE? We meet every Tuesday in my treehouse. Like The Famous Five. But evil.

Yours,

Brian Oliver Blofeld.

PS. Do you think I should change my name? 

 

By an amazing coincidence, this highly educational pamphlet was also in the rubbish:

 

 

It's official: James Bond will return on November 9th 2012. EON and MGM have announced that the 23rd Bond film will begin production at the end of this year for the 2012 release date (the news broke over at ComingSoon.net). Daniel Craig will return as James Bond, with Sam Mendes as director. The screenplay's written by Neal Purvis, Robert Wade and John Logan.

Craig. Mendes. Bond. 2012. Ok, now you can run around and scream your face off with excitement. I already have twice.

 

Tony Gilroy is in talks to take over the fourth Bourne film. Not that he's ever been far away from controlling them - he's scripted all of them since Doug Liman's initial Bourne Identity.

Provisionally titled The Bourne Legacy, the fourth outing for Jason Bourne has already been written by Gilroy, who was hired back in June to scribble something down on paper. With Paul Greengrass taking himself out of the director's chair last year, Universal need a man to sit at the helm. And the Michael Clayton man isn't a bad choice at all.

Whether we need another adventure for the amnesiac spy now that he's got all his memories back is another question entirely. Matt Damon has already said that he won't return without Greengrass, so the studio will be on the hunt for either a new central character or a new Damon replacement.

The Bourne Legacy was originally scheduled for 2012, but that timetable's up in the air at present. Expect something to get locked down in the next couple of months.

 

Ok, so Tom Hardy hasn't declared war with McG. He's done something quite, quite different: he's signed up for a film called This Means War. Directed by McG.

Yes, the suave Brit who blew everyone away with his scenery-devouring Bronson performance, before going on to prove his action credentials with Christopher Nolan's mind-bending Inception, will now star in a film by McG. From James Bond contender to Charlie's Angels follow-up in the blink of an eye.

This Means War is a high-concept blend of action, romance and comedy - an action rom-com, if you allow us to coin a brand new genre. Back in 2001, Chris Rock and Martin Lawrence were attached to play two spies fighting over one woman (Reese Witherspoon). It never too off.

In recent years, it looked like Bradley Cooper and Chris Pine would be filling the manly parts. That is, until Cooper dropped out because he thought the script was a bit naff. Along came Sam Worthington - McG stalwart after Terminator Salvation - who ultimately passed as well.

And so in steps Tom Hardy to take up the battle for Reese Witherspoon, as he and Pine, two lifelong secret agent friends, declare full-on black ops warfare against each other. Then, when the film finally gets made, McG can make a sequel: This Really Means War. In which thousands of Inception and Bronson fans declare full-on black ops warfare against Tom Hardy for selling out.

In another unexpected move, Bond producers have approached a director not known for his action sequences: Sam Mendes. The helmer of such subtle dramas as American Beauty is in talks to direct 007's next outing. A surprise choice, yes, but one that might pay off huge dividends.

Previous pick Marc Forster added an arty sheen to one theatre sequence but was otherwise overwhelmed by a second unit which preferred jumpy camerawork to an actual plot, but Mendes is man of more experience. Handling whimsical romance in Away We Go and bitter period reality in Revolutionary Road, this is the guy who also brought us the virtuosic violence of Road to Perdition -a stunning graphic novel adaptation.

There's no title yet - all we know is Daniel Craig will be returning - but the jack of all trades could well add a touch of subtlety and class to our melancholic protagonist. After all, with Peter Morgan on scripting duties, the theatrically steeped two are well matched for content and style. An Oscar winning director taking on Britain's biggest franchise? Bring it on. I'll even take Winslet as a Bond girl if I must.

People gather around, shrieking their heads off and hoping to see Matt Damon, star of The Informant! They're disappointed - he was never down to attend the London Film Festival anyway. A comedy based on real events, the film is a strange subversion of the corporate thriller, full of nods to The Firm and a bizarrely silly voiceover.

Stylish and snappy, it's directed by none other than Steven Soderbergh. Now there's a reason to start screaming, folks. This guy's far more exciting to talk to. Which is exactly what we end up doing as he strolls down the carpet...

Director: Steven Soderbergh
Cast: Matt Damon, Scott Bakula, Melanie Lynskey
Certificate: 15

"Polar bears cover their noses before they pounce on a seal. How do they know their noses are black?" Meet Mark Whitacre (Damon), biochemist, businessman and FBI snitch. He works for ADM, an agricultural giant who produce corn byproducts. Yes, corn. Mark's life is surrounded by it. As he drives home past corn fields, he teaches his son all about the yellow stuff. While they travel, the camera flips the car upside down. The world stays like that for the rest of the film.