Rango has reached the top of the UK Box Office after a lukewarm week that saw no-one make very much money. But don't worry: Submarine didn't sink, even if it did surface in 12th place. More on that later.

Dreamworks' animated Western took the number one spot from Battle: Los Angeles, dropping 32% down to £1.05m. That's not a lot for a chart-topper, but it's got a healthy £5m running total now, which it's clocked up outside of half term and without 3D uplifts.

It's also the only film to take more than £1 million this week, as it doesn't look like many people went to the pictures over the weekend: Rango's £500k drop is more than most of the new releases made in their first week.

Chalet Girl sloped in at number four (the highest of the debuts) with an alright £677k. Taking into account the usually reliable demographic of teenage girls, though, it's a bit of a downhill run for the rather excellent rom-com (that's right: it's excellent). Still, its Wednesday-Thursday previews helped it jump over The Lincoln Lawyer, which came in fifth with £571k.

The week's other popular release was Anuvahood, which had a solid opening, taking £536k from around 149 cinemas. That's an average of £3,600 per screen, the best of the UK Top Ten, which not only beats Felicity Jones and Matthew McConaughey but also makes it look bare easy, blud, you get me? Regardless of negative reviews and the limited print run, the audience for the gangsta comedy clearly liked the film - even more than I liked using the word 'blud' in that last sentence.

Battle: Los Angeles stormed the UK Box Office this weekend with an opening of £1.79m. That’s just ahead of Rango, which took £1.54m in its second week.

Jonathan Liebesman’s crap alien invasion didn’t light up the UK as it did the US ($36m across the pond should have led to £3.6m here), but Aaron Eckhart’s chin stuck out just far enough to hold off Nickelodeon’s Sergio Chameleone – and that’s no mean feat, given that the gun-toting lizard dropped a microscopic 6.02%. That’s a difference of just £98k from its £1.64m opening, proving that people are still enjoying Rango outside of half term.

The week’s other victory belonged to Unknown, as Liam Neeson leapfrogged Matt Damon into third place. Neeson’s amnesiac revenge thriller had the higher screen average last week and continues to pack in the punters, even though The Adjustment Bureau holds around 100 more screens. So while Damon dropped a typical 35%, Neeson shaved off only 23%. Bourne meets Aslan. Aslan wins.

Folks presumably queued round the block last weekend to see The Adjustment Bureau, the film that suddenly EVERYONE was calling "Bourne Meets Inception!" since TotalFilm coined the phrase (which is pretty much meaningless) and someone slapped it on the poster.

Things got even worse when people started describing Liam Neeson's thriller Unknown as "Bourne Meets Taken" - presumably because it features Liam Neeson and involves someone forgetting something. In which case, you might as well call it "The Lion, The Witch and the Wardrobe Meets Memento".

But what if people don't want to see Bourne Meets Inception or Bourne Meets Taken? Never fear: you can describe literally EVERY FILM EVER MADE as "Bourne Meets" something. Just insert any word you want. Bourne Meets Casino. Bourne Meets Public Transport. Bourne Meets Cheese Sandwich. It really is that easy.

Here are a few ideas, just in case you need to describe a film to someone in the next week...

Director: Jaume Collet-Serra
Cast: Liam Neeson, Diane Kruger, January Jones, Frank Langella, Bruno Ganz
Certificate: 15

There's nothing quite like Liam Neeson killing people. From Taken to The A-Team, Liam's just really good at bumping people off. So it's great to see that, even when he suffers an identity crisis, he still remembers how to brutally pummel a man to death.