|Out of the Loop? The State of Westminster|
|Written by Ivan Radford|
|Monday, 20 April 2009 17:29|
“What are you watching?” “A documentary on sharks - I don’t want porn turning up on the expenses.”
While we wait for your reply, let’s debate something more pressing: with two political films released in two consecutive weeks, which is more accurate in its depiction of cabinet cover-ups? In the Loop? Or State of Play?
Proof that all men named Damian are evil, McBride was fired over his role in a proposed Labour blog, “RedRag”, which he suggested could run rumours, like David Cameron having STDs, George Osborne cross-dressing, or Michael Howard not drinking blood. False and puerile to the extreme, but Labour blogger Derek Draper loved the ideas. An immature smear campaign? In party politics?
I Predict a Riot
At the beginning of the month, 5,000 protestors took to the streets for the G20 summit. After controversial police tactics were used to pen in and suppress the crowds, Ian Tomlinson died, minutes after being struck and pushed to the ground by a police officer. The officer had covered up his identification number.
Even when something is considered suspicious – post-mortems, second homes, banking practises – it never stays secret for long. Cover-ups we can’t do; cock-ups, now there’s a more British thing. Where else in the world can people leave confidential papers on trains? Or lose personal data in the post? Hell, we even grass each other up to the cops when we don’t like the leaks – Gordon Brown’s 1990’s flooding aside.
And amidst it all, there’s the one conclusive proof of intelligent design in the universe: Boris Johnson. As Malcolm Tucker runs around Westminster, swearing his arse off at incompetent officials, people say things like “that would never happen”. Or, “politicans aren’t that crass all the time”. Old bumbly BoJo, of course, has never sworn in his life. Oh, except for that phone call back in February. Which, if you recall, was all about the arrest of Damien Green (Labour’s least-favourite leaky Tory.
Out of the Loop