Director: Andrew Stanton
Cast: Taylor Kitsch, Lynn Collins, Mark Strong, Dominic West
Certificate: 12A
Trailer

“You think you know Mars… BUT YOU DO NOT KNOW MARS.” A booming voiceover begins Disney’s epic sci-fi romance. It’s ridiculous. It’s laughable. It sounds incredibly stupid. But from that daft opening narration, Andrew Stanton’s John Carter is properly charming stuff.

The tale of a confederate US soldier who travels through space, battles green men with shiny blue weapons and falls in love with a princess? It’s the kind of nonsense that could only be written by a barmy warlock  in the early 20th Century. And it’s all the better for it. Edgar Rice Burroughs' story may be packed with state of the art mo-cap, but Disney’s latest is as dated as Clash of the Titans, as cheesy as Flash Gordon and as crazy as H.P. Lovecraft. In short, it’s what all old-school fantasy adventures should be: wonderfully bonkers.

The Awakening blew its chilling blend of Jonathan Creek and pure abject terror into UK cinemas last week. It's an intelligent film, rooted in post-World War loss, with a lead character worthy of her own TV series.

Meet Florence Cathcart (Rebecca Hall), a smart, sceptical and sophisticated paranormal investigator in the 1920s. Busting spirits long before Bill Murray or Scooby Doo came along, Cathcart's old-school methods are a lesson in how to debunk supernatural suspicions using just a handful of shiny steampunk gadgets and some above-average brain cells.

So it's only natural that Nick Murphy's horror (co-starring Dominic West) forms the basis of this handy guide to investigating haunted houses. 

If there's something strange in your neighbourhood... sort it yourself. Here's how to be a ghost-buster:

For more infographicky goodness, take a look at some of our other How To guides, including the indispensible Jurassic Park Survival Guide, How to Stop the End of the World, How to Break Out of Prison - and a diagram of Christian Bale Punching People.

Alternatively, head this way to read our review of The Awakening - and then go and see it in your nearest cinema.

Director: Nick Murphy
Cast: Rebecca Hall, Dominic West, Imelda Staunton
Certificate: 15
Release Date: Friday 11th November
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The Awakening review

In post-World War I England in 1921, an author and paranormal sceptic (Hall) is invited to a countryside boarding school by the history master (West) to investigate rumours of an apparent haunting.

But just when she thinks she has debunked the ghost theory, she has a chilling encounter which makes her question all her rational beliefs.

Director: Nick Murphy
Cast: Rebecca Hall, Dominic West, Imelda Staunton, Isaac Hempstead Wright
Certificate: 15
Trailer

We all thought the same thing when we saw Pride and Prejudice: Pemberley is terrifying. Well, now we've been proved right, because Nick Murphy's made a horror movie there. And it's even scarier than Mr. Darcy's manners.

Florence Cathcart (Hall) is a woman who believes in science over spirits. She runs around period England disproving paranormal acitivity, using nothing more than a bag of mechanical contraptions and her brain. She's like the new Jonathan Creek. A ghostbuster, 1920s style.

Director: Nick Murphy
Cast: Rebecca Hall, Dominic West, Imelda Staunton, Isaac Hempstead Wright
Showtimes

We all thought the same thing when we saw Pride and Prejudice: Pemberley is terrifying. Well, now we've been proved right, because Nick Murphy's made a horror movie there. And it's even scarier than Mr. Darcy's manners.

Florence Cathcart (Hall) is a woman who believes in science over spirits. She runs around period England disproving paranormal acitivity, using nothing more than some mechanical contraptions and her brain. She's like the new Jonathan Creek. A ghostbuster, 1920s style.

Director: Oliver Parker
Cast: Rowan Atkinson, Rosamund Pike, Gillian Anderson, Dominic West
Certificate: 12A

Have you seen those adverts starring Rowan Atkinson’s incompetent secret agent? No, not the ones currently plastered all over UK buses – the original Barclaycard skits from the 90s. It’s rather impressive that 20 years on, people are paying to see the same James Bond spoof on a big screen. What’s more impressive is that after the generally likeable and harmless first film, this pointless sequel isn’t actually that bad. Well, it’s better than Quantum of Solace anyway.

"For five winters now, you have hidden from the world..."

You wouldn't expect Johnny English 2 to start with a bearded karate training montage. Then again, most of us didn't expect Johnny English 2 at all. But the new video for Johnny English Reborn is here and that's how it starts. You can literally count the seconds until the first man-gets-kicked-in-balls moment.

From then on, it's a bizarre mix of the usual clueless pratfalls and some set pieces in which Rowan Atkinson seems to have proper fighting skillz - how does that fit in with the bloke off the Barclaycard adverts? No idea, although the script obviously convinced Rosamund Pike, Dominic West, Pierce Brosnan and Gillian Anderson to join in.

The bottom line? The Johnny English Reborn trailer is amazing. In German. 

The less impressive English version can be seen online at Yahoo! Movies. Read on for the full video.

It was back in April that we first heard rumours about Johnny English 2. But now, the sequel that nobody wanted has claimed its first victims: Dominic West and Rosamund Pike. They each get a free Barclaycard.

It's no surprise they're keen to work on the project. After all, Rowan Atkinson is a top-drawer performer. And Johnny English was clearly the greatest British comedy since A Fish Called Wanda. And anything that St Trinian's director Oliver Parker touches turns straight to solid gold [insert word here].

The Wire's McNulty joins Rowan Atkinson and Gillian Anderson for an escapade that reeks of political correctness: Johnny English will be travelling to China. Yes, the script (by Mr Bean's Holiday writer Hamish McColl) sees the secret agent trying to save the life of China's premier from a group of assassins. Or something.

It starts shooting today before heading to Hong Kong when people have finished throwing tomatoes and cans of dog wee at them.